“The first time I witnessed his portrayal of Jack Sparrow was at a Renaissance Faire. From afar, he looked and sounded just like JD and the large gathering of people around him made it even harder to tell the difference. The men and the women, were throwing their underoos at him and he caught every one and placed them in a sack. I followed him for hours, bewildered, and people just kept slinging their jockies at him and he kept catching them and sticking them in the sack, like some kind of reverse, panty thieving Santa pirate. By sun down, I am sure the entire fairground had gone commando. And in expert Jack Sparrow fashion, he ended his tour of the Faire atop the princess tower. And out of the sack, he pulled a giant sail made from everyone’s under garments. He waved at the remaining patrons, said his famous catch phrase, and sailed into the sky and off towards the horizon like a bearded Mary Poppins. Absolutely magical, it was. I need new boxers.”
